Meditating on the Past

It’s a common belief that meditation is about being in the present.

That’s why you are asked to focus on your breath or chant. I think the idea is that by focusing on the singular, it stops your mind from wandering. And when your mind wanders it is usually into the past or future.

When your mind wanders in the present, it isn’t really wandering at all. Instead, you are either in problem solving mode or meditating. You may be solving a problem for the future or coming up with ideas as to how a past action can be improved upon, but the actual thought is focused on the present moment of problem solving.

The other day I was listening to a podcast and the guest shared his method of meditation. Unfortunately, I can’t remember the guest’s name or even the podcast. Anyway, he said he doesn’t do any specific meditation, such as focusing on the breath. Instead, all he does is sit there quietly for an hour and allow his mind to wander.

Apparently, after doing this a few times, or perhaps many times, you will start to process a lot of stuff. I can see how this would be true. In fact, I learned from the Huberman Show about Pennebaker journaling, which to me seems like an accelerated version of this.

In Pennebaker journaling you basically use expressive writing focusing on specific emotional experiences for 15-20 minutes per day over four consecutive days.

I haven’t tried Pennebaker journaling yet, but I have tried sitting quietly and letting my mind wander several times. I guess in reality we all do this a lot during the day, but to consciously sit and do it is something I’ve never done before.

The thing is, every time I do it, I find myself going more into the past than the future, and this actually brings me quite a bit of joy.

Obviously, the reality of this depends on the individual and their past. Though everyone has undoubtedly had both good and bad experiences, of course there are some people with deeper trauma.

Probably the reason my experience is mostly joyful is because I end up digging up memories of previous travels.

While I was doing this, it occurred to me that this is probably the best reason to go traveling. Why would I spend so much time and energy to travel to new places and have different experiences if for the rest of my time I am striving to live in the present?

I like reaching into my memories and reliving my travels. And they are not always good memories. I’ve had some bad experiences over the years, but revisiting them now is still fun.

I hope that when I am old in a rocking chair I can still access at least some of these memories.