Models Chapter 14 Summary: Physicality and Sex

Women are a lot kinkier than most men think.

That woman you think is frigid probably has some wild fantasies, and if you play your cards right, maybe she will act them out with you.

Women want to be wanted, so don’t be shy.

In fact, the more assertively you pursue a woman, the more aroused she becomes.

Even just a seemingly innocent light touch will generate sexual tension.

Getting physical with a woman as quickly and comfortably as you can is the most important factor for your success in dating her.

If you don’t get physical, you will be put in the friend zone.

Getting physical with women early and often can overcome many barriers, and is also very polarizing, which is a good thing.

Even if you are a bumbling idiot when it comes to holding a conversation, always move forward physically.

Touch her early, touch her often, and if she doesn’t reciprocate, just keep trying until she either does reciprocate or she clearly tells you to back off.

If she does tell you to stop, ask her if she’s uncomfortable and why she’s uncomfortable.

It’s very important to respect her boundaries, but often she just needs to slow down, in which case, do so.

Right from the start, a great way to initiate touch is a handshake, or depending on the social situation, e.g., meeting friends of friends, a hug.

During the conversation, assuming a girl is not completely unreceptive to you, lightly touch her near the elbow.

Time the touch to emphasize the part of your conversation where in writing, you might use an exclamation mark or a question mark.

Other good ways to initiate physical contact are with games like thumb wars, high fives, twirling her, dancing, etc.

As time goes on, your touching should become more personal. It’s a progression.

Start with the extremities – her hands, arms, and legs – and gradually move onto her core, such as placing your hand on her back and putting your arm around her.

Progress further to more intimate touching such as tickling, massages, and cuddling.

Finally, it gets to kissing and becoming sexual.

It’s the woman's job to give the “go and stop” signals.

It’s the man’s job to escalate on those signals.

This is the unwritten rule.

Unfortunately, most men are terrible at reading a woman’s signals.

Every stage of the seduction has different signals you must learn to recognize so you can escalate to the next stage.

Do not skip signal stages. It is a step by step path, and she ALWAYS has the option to back out.

If you are ever in doubt about the signals, err on the side of escalation.

Here are signals women will give to let you know you should approach and start a conversation with them.

• Non-accidental eye contact.
• Smiling at you.
• She approaches you, even if it is for a trivial reason such as asking for the time.
• Proximity. This is when she gravitates near you when she doesn’t have to.

When a woman gives you these signals you should continue flirting and initiate touch.

• Excessive smiling and laughing
• Playing with her hair
• Eyes dilating (big doe eyes)
• Standing closer to you
• Lots of eye contact
• Prioritizing you over others

When a woman is ready to get more physical with you, e.g., kiss, she will make it as easy as possible for you to make the move.

Here are some signals for you to go for the kiss:

• She isolates herself with you
• She ditches her friends for you
• She touches you, either initiation or reciprocation

If you think you could have kissed a woman, chances are you already could have and she is probably wondering when you are going to.

So as soon as you have any inkling that she wants to be kissed, go for it.

If she turns her head or doesn’t reciprocate, pull back and ask her if everything is okay. Does she not like you or are you just moving too fast?

Many women won’t kiss you in front of people they know or in public, no matter how much they like you. Try isolating her so she feels more comfortable.

When kissing, you want to massage her lips with yours while gently roaming her body with your hands.

DO NOT:

• Slobber all over her face.
• Shove your tongue down her throat.
• Peck her like she’s some old relative.
• Apply too much pressure.
• Immediately go into “fuck” mode.

When you are in a discreet place and you think she is ready, have your hands find their way to her breasts.

In most cases, if she allows this it is a strong sign she is ready for things to go further.

Men are like light switches. We get turned on in an instant. Women are more like dimmer switches. You need to build your way up. From kissing to kissing with roaming hands, to shedding some clothes, then more kissing and touching, then removing more clothes, and so on.

Escalate, plateau, escalate, plateau, escalate, plateau.

If at any stage she objects, e.g., she tells you she just wants to mess around and not have sex, always tell her “That’s fine. We’ll do whatever you’re comfortable with.”

Many women say this and end up having sex. Many women say this and they mean it. Accept what happens. Either of you can opt in or out at any time during the process.

If she physically stops you, such as moving your hands off her, or clearly tells you “Stop” or “No” then, in general, it is safe to continue to escalate.

If she is passed out drunk or anything like that, leave her alone!

Sex is meant to be enjoyable for the both of you, and women love foreplay.

Get her turned on with lots of foreplay and you will both have better sex.

Start by sucking and massaging her bare breasts. You can test gently biting her nipples and if she is into it she probably likes sex a little rougher too.

Kiss over her body and finger her or rub her clitoris. But don’t just go straight in. Lightly touch around her pussy with your fingertips first. Tease her before finally going in. If she is wet then continue to gradually escalate. If she is dry, continue to plateau with more kissing.

This is also the perfect time to go down on her if you are into it. Again, tease her first. Kiss down her body and the inside of her thighs. Create anticipation.

Just like taking the lead on a date, you must also take the lead in the bedroom.

Here are signals women will give to let you know you should approach and start a conversation with them.

• Be loud. Grunt and breathe hard. Express your primality.
• Talk dirty. The rules change in the bedroom. Call her a dirty girl and tell her how sexy she is.
• Get physical. Even women that aren’t into the rough stuff like it a little rough. Spank her, pull her hair, hold her down, physically move her when changing positions.
• Don’t ask. She will tell you if you are going too far.

It takes time to adapt to each other's bedroom tendencies and preferences. You need to have a good sense of humor when things go wrong and be able to talk about your likes and dislikes.

If you don’t like how she does something, tell her, and encourage her to do the same. And if you do like it, definitely let her know and she will keep doing it!

If you can get her to laugh she’ll forget all the awkwardness and your screw-ups.

Many men have the problem of either cumming too fast or not being able to get hard (too slow.)

In most cases, both are caused by sexual anxiety, which is directly related to other forms of anxiety such as lack of confidence, shame, neediness, etc.

If you cum too fast, try thicker condoms and/or specialized cream. Masturbating an hour or so before sex also helps, as does thinking about non-sexual things.

You can also purposefully slow things down. Lean more into foreplay until you are more comfortable.

If you can’t get it up, try herbal supplements.

For deep rooted issues, therapy can help.

When you first meet a woman, generally she has the power of choice whether or not to have sex with you.

Once you’ve had sex, assuming you are a non-needy male, this dynamic will switch. Now it is usually about whether the man will commit or not.

If the man is needy and this dynamic doesn’t switch, then the attraction will not last.

Read the next chapter here.

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